I think about things all the time that I guess are so far out there that they would never happen. But I'm such a stress prosed person that I think about what would happen to me. Like pregnancy. I just saw some internet add about teen pregnancy and it scared me. I mean I'll most likely worry about this for the rest of my life. I mean it would be horrible. My mom and I had a conversation about this a while aga but I never put it into context. Why should I? It was my mom speaking. I never listen to her. But I remember some things she said that I totally did not agree on. For one thing, abortion. She said that if I got pregnant before I was married and out of the house, she'd make me get an abortion. Well I hate this idea. Never, I repeat, NEVER, will I have abortion. That is bluntly out of the question. Most of you know what abortion is, so I won't go into the reasons why. I'd have the baby and most likely keep it. No matter what I'd have to do. This isn't like I'm planning on having a baby or anything,I'm still a virgin. And I plan to stay that way until near, very near, marriage. But I make myself think about these things and then I worry meyself to no end. It's terribly trivial, but hey, this is me I'm talking about. And I have a way to make every possibility fit into the picture. Now for today's Greg update. My battleship's uder siege. I find it impossible to move towards him and my stomache wrenches into a know when he smiles at me. I don't know. I'm just strange like that. I need some advice but I can't go to anyone for it. I am lost in that pit I was telling you about before. Every breath I take I fall further and further into it. I feel I'll never be able to see the light again. I feel like I should just tell him to let me out. But I don't know how when I'm so far down he can't hear me. That's how I know I wouldn't do well in a cavern. Not well at all. Well I leave you at this one last comment: Greg is my immortality. Renee'