well yea right no i am feeling about as depressed as i've ever felt. my life is so fucked up without you and you know who you are. i really miss you. no matter what i do i cant get you out of my head the only time i am not thinking about how bad i fucked up is when i am completly hammered. i just really wish things would have been different. i guess i should have taken you more seriously because i really fucked things up. but right now it just seems that i only have like 3 people that r here for me. and it just seems fucked up cause i used to be good friends with everyone and now i am pretty much a loner. i am also fed up with living the earlier my life ends the happier i'll be. unless i can find someone as good as you to keep me from doing something dumb.