So im pretty sure that i met this incredable guy named jesse. he is pretty awesome and we spend like everyday together and i think we are getting pretty serious' but i dont know whats really gonna come of this wonderful sex relationship that we are having i really like him though and i hope that one day we can be WAY more then just sexx. but oh well and all you people who happen to read this and thing that i am a 16 year old slut, maybe you should take a fucking look around you?? there are other people that have sex and its just a fact of life. so get the fuck over yourselfs. you fucking idiots. thanks now that little slut rampage is over. older guys are perttty hot im sure. Me and My bestesst brittany both have them older, and i dont give a flying shit what people haft to say about it anymore, its not discusting you cant help who your heart decides to fal in love with or in like with so whatever get over your fucking selfs we dont wanna hear you gay shit anyways so yea im pretty grumpy kinda today hey, i guess you could say that but i dont care cause i was up till late everynight now with Jesse, so pretty sure its all fucking worth it. and another note, Brittany should maybe possibly write in her diary because what the hell do we have this shit for. hahah if we dont even fucking write in it anymore, this is pretty gay i believe so hahahaahha but yea whatever BRITTANY WRITE IN YOUR DIARY .. kay peace. <3

okayy so about all that shit that im over kyle and ready for something new, fucck that shit i am so not ready for something new i never will be. i am so madly in love with the fucking kid, i never want to be with anyone but him in my entire life. Kyle is everything to me and i dont know what im doing without him. My lifes incomplete without him . My lifes not worth living without him. I took him for granted, and i was stupid adn i know that now that ive lost the only good thing i had going for myself. i should call him, and tell him howi feel but i dont know what to say, im scared. of rejection or better yet him telling me he hates me and never wants to talk to me again. cause i look desperate begging for his forgiveness, and to take me back. like what am i ? hahah what have i come down tooo

wow, this diary thing is kinda lame ass. well its 2006 which means a new year which means a new beginning a new me, im tired of being upset adn lonley all the time, but theres nothing i can do about it, but try and be happy again. Without Kyle, i know its really hard, but he was in the past i am never going to forget him but i think i should just move on and continue living my life, and if me and kyle somewhere down the line, meet again and give us a shot again, then so be it.. i love him more t hen life and i miss him alot, but i know i can do this. Well, brittany was down here lastweek, boy was that ever a fun week. Did e for my very first time, it was amazingly fun, hah i had a very good time doing it. I might do it again one day but who knows. hahaha She was here for new years, we went to bailey and ajs, adn she started feeling kinda sick, so Roddy drove her home, and Roddy came back. He got pretty drunk, and got daring adn drank this really strong whiskeey or something adn then puked outside, and then he went and decided to lick it up off the groubd, what a fucking goofball. it was a fun way to bring in the new year, i just wish that i could have been out with Kyle, like i was lastyear, lastyears new years was the best one of my life, this year kinda sucked, not what i had expected it to be, not at all. but what are ya gonna do. well this shit is pretty lame i guess, i have nithing else to write, xoxoox jessica.

Omggg Cranbrook next weekend, im so fucking exxcited to the maxx. hahah im going down with mary. i cant wait. hahaha gonnna parrtayy harddy . im finally single now i can actually have some fun without worrying about kyle, and what hes doing and all that other junk, i have no worries this time, im so fucking exxcited hahahahah gonan be the best trip of them all. best one in a while hahahahah anyways im goingto bed got schoola dn work tomorrow. xoox

i love him alot, but i am slowly starting to not care about him anymore which is a really good tghing for me im proud. but anyways i gotta go tgo math . bye

im so confused about absolutley everything that is going on with me and kyle, we have gone through so much, and i have no idea whats even going on with us anymore; He is supposed to call me on like saturday adn were gonna talk about our relationship & if theres even anything left to save, i believe that there is, and i wanna try adn make this whole thing work, and i want it to work forever, but i dont know if thats what he wants anymore, i need something more, from him, and i need him to start showing more appriciation for what hes got, cause hes got something really great going for himself, and hes about to loose it. I was reading the last entry i wrote adn it talked about how we were amazing and perfect well that just goes to show you how fast things can go wrong. It was like a month, haha and now were like fighting and back to the same old shit. I dont know what to do anymore i hate this shit. grr. anyways i gotta get back to "work" so ill maybe write soon again, haha if i have some time, cause this shit is quite frankly gay.

me and kyle are better then ever our little break up scare week really put a new attitude about our realtionship and now we care about eachother more then ever and i cant stop thinking about him, he means more to me then anything and i would do absolutley anything for him and im doing really good i dont wanan ever cheat on him again, i have no intentions to and i will never do it again im not like that anymore and i have for surely changed my ways for good i lvoe him so much x43870534583069945 hesss so amazing adn i wanna be with him forever i love you kyle ; xooxxo you mean everything to me !

i went to the shuswap on july 22, and man oh man, it started off horrible me nad kyle fought like fucking crazy, and then one day i finally told kyle that i couldnt fucking do it anymore, and he appoligized for absoluley everything and me and him talked for hours, and we totally fell in love again, and now everything with me and him is better then ever before. i lov ehim so fucking much . we have been together for 2 years now, our anniversary was on the 2nd . hes gonna come into calgary this weekend, here adn take me to dinner and a movie, and then come stay at my house, and just have it a me and him night aas his present from him, i was so excited when he told me thats what he was gonna do, i love him so fucking much, he is making me the happiest girl alive. ... well anyways i said fuck my other diary and now im using this one. so yea dont look at my other one ill be writing in this one now. xoxxox

fucking other freakin diary is fuckkedd upi so im gonna use this one now i guess GRRRRRR