Ughhh, I'm really mad right now. Me && my friend, Liz have a notebook together, like, we write to eachother && such, && she wrote alot about this guy she likes && i wrote soo much about Raymond, stuff that I haven't told anyone before. And the guy she likes read the whole entire thing. It was like, my innermost thoughts && stuff, and this guy i barely know knows everything about me now. && like, i think that shes coming home w/me tommorow && if we all go to the movies it'll be weird, b/c he knows i like raymond, && idk. i just feel all uncomfortable know. which i shouldnt, because right about now i should be going out with the grease monkey, but idk whats going on. Like, its weird. Nothing has changed. Well, its like hes more distant. aglkjdlkafj idk. this is all bull. but i wish he would realise how much i like himmmm. gahh. i've been having like, the worst 2 days ever. Yesterday i hung out with lisa and graham, && i swear to god, graham must be bi, not gay. He was like, feeling up on my hips && everything. it was really really weird. Haha, i put him in a headlock && threw him on the ground :] but still, i dont think he gets that hes not one of the girls, and he cant do that. because like, i slapped lisas butt && then he started slappin it too, && mine. and then tappin on my hips && such. ughh idk. i know things could be worse, but theres just so much shit going on && i dont want to have to deal with it. i just want to go in my room, go to sleep, and never come out. well, i would come out once raymond finally decided what the fuck he wants from me :/ i mean, ladkgalfjkdsg;jaakfkdlagksdfs. how longs it gonna take? his girlfriend treats him like total and complete shit. I like him, he likes me. && i would never treat him like that. idk, doesnt it seem like a simple decision to you? aglkjdlrkfds idk anymore. i just wannna cry