I'll wear your rejection like a clashing coat and scarf. The gaudy colors run together like your words of deceit. They spill from your mouth like paint on canvas. Bright colors mix and mingle; becoming a beautiful oblivion of tangled metaphors you feed me like colorful pills; Slipping down my throat easily when chased by the cheap pastel word vomit you so readily produce and shove at me like it's going out of style. __________________ The past few days have been a strange parade of hormones and depression. I want comfort but I don't want it from them. I don't want it from anyone I know. So I'll just go without. I cannot love. I cannot feel. And it's all your fault. I hate crying all the time. Feeling so down. I want love. I want to scrub my skin off. I want to remove my fingerprints and become someone new and yet someone who doesn't exist. I don't want to live but I don't want to die. Someone help me. Don't make me say those words. It's only a lie. How can I love you when my heart is disposable and the only thing that beats is the adreneline in my veins. I CANNOT LOVE. I AM EMPTY. DISCARD ME DISCARD ME DISCARD ME I hate. Watch me rip out your heart and eat it with a fork. I will only hurt you so why let down your gaurd. I can never be. Ever be. Never touch me again. Who is this girl and what has she done to me?? I am a liar. I am a whore. Kill me.