Well since i havent written in a billion and 8 days i dont really know what to say, cause its alot of catch a person up on. haha. but I got sent away for a month or so and it was the worst and best thing that ever happened to me, the girls there were like family to me, and i learned soo much, but kyle and them just called and i think they're stopping by..fuckin a.. i'll really write more later..I'm sober and clean :) and damnnnn proud of it. R.I.P Anthony.

I'm sittin' here all by myself just tryin' to think of something to do Tryin' to think of something, anything just to keep me from thinking of you But you know it's not working out 'cause you're all that's on my mind One thought of you is all it takes to leave the rest of the world behind Well I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did And you didn't mean to love me back, but I know you did I'm sittin' here tryin' to convince myself that you're not the one for me But the more I think, the less I believe it and the more I want you here with me You know the holidays are coming up I don't want to spend them alone Memories of Christmas time with you will just kill me if I'm on my own Well I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did And you didn't mean to love me back I know it's not the smartest thing to do we just can't seem to get it right But what I wouldn't give to have one more chance tonight One more chance tonight I'm sittin' here tryin' to entertain myself with this old guitar But with all my inspiration gone it's not getting me very far I look around my room and everything I see reminds me of you Oh please, baby won't you take my hand we've got nothing left to prove Well I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did And you didn't mean to love me back, but I know you did And I didn't mean to meet you then we were just kids And I didn't mean to give you chills the way that I kiss And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did And you didn't mean to love me back but I know you did Don't say you didn't love me back 'cause you know you did No, you didn't mean to love me back But you did

stay away as i hurt everything in sight just sit and watch dont get attached you'll only get hurt my heart is absent my touch is cold I have no feelings, no emotion i watch you cry i smile slyly As you look into my eyes the world goes grey, you see the pain as your heart gets colder

Look i cant change the way i think and i cant change the way i am but if i offended you? good. i still dont give a fuck For all the weed that i've smoked yo this blunts for you To all the people ive offended Yeah fuck you to To all the friends I used to have yo I miss my past but the rest of you assholes can kiss my ass To all the drugs I've done Yo I'm still goin' to To all the people Ive offended yeah fuck you to To everytime I reminisce yo I miss my past But I still dont give a fuck Y'all can kiss my ass

Alright, the weekly saturday night kegger gets better every fucking weekend. Me and Felton got ready here and Makar and Jake picked us up at 9. As where walking in Kyle and Ziggy are standing there so we all walk in and idk started partyingx3333. Im in the bathroom with Tina and Ashley comes in and says Keri's here so im like uhh hell nah so i walk out and start bitching so i got in her face and she grabbed my hair and i slammed her head into the wall and she was swinging but she didnt hit me she just wouldnt let go of my fucking hair so i just uppercut into her stomach and face and Felton went to jump in and grabbed my waist and punched, but she punched me on accident? haha idk the whole room was yelling shit and there was beer everywhere and Mike pulled me back and there was like 5black guys standing there and they came over and they were like yo this is my girl the mothafuckin champ, haha they were like yo my baby just won round one..so the whole night they called me Tyson or champ haha. And she still didnt fucking leave so me and jenna go to go after her and Ashleys like nah she left..so we go running outside to get her and shes there with JeanMarc and somebody else and there walking back inside so Jenna hands me her beer and i was like heyy jeanmarc wait a second so hes like wait and im bullshitting my way threw this conversation but im drunk so its working and i walk up the stairs and i see Jenna smiling and she goes 'oh keri you gotta knock to get in' keris like oh haha thanks and she turns and looks at Jenna and goes damn its so cold and shes smiling and Jenna slams her in her fucking temple so fucking hard LMAO. and just as she hit her the door opens and Keri goes flying threw and falls into Ashley and Ashley grabs her and throws her into Beth and Beth takes the back of her head and slams it into the fucking floor so im jumping threw everybody to kick the shit outta this bitch and they wouldnt let me threw haha so yeah she left after that.oh and some point we tried to jump her in the bathroom and jumped over the counter and Mikel was there and i punched the door screaming shit and the diamonds fell outta my ring haha but dont worry i found them. Speaking of that my lip ring thing fell out and closed up so i gotta go get that shit redone next week or something..But anywaysss Kyle was way to drunk and he pulled me over to him and hes like danika i dont want you with any of these guys here, i will protect you, stay with me haha so i did and we went outside to talk and he puked and shit and Tina came and sat with him and me and ziggy went back upstairs and i went to check on Kyle a few times but he wasnt moving. So i was in the kitchen with all these guys that graduated a few years ago and there all around me and were talking and shit and the door opens so i look over and theres those guys from Montrose and im like hey and i keep talking and i look back and im wicked drunk and all over these guys and laughing and shit and i look back and Kris is standing there, my mouth just dropped and i was just standing there and the guys are all like baby blah blah so i go threw them and i kissed him and they all look over and i was like um this my boy. they were like ohh shit and they started running there mouths about how they were gonna kick his ass and ziggy comes up and puts his arm around me and hes like this is my beer buddy, my girl, and they were all in the kitchen seriously ready to kick his ass and they were like nah nah we'll kick any fuckers ass lets go and half the guys are holding the other guys back and the other guys are jsut reaching over them with there hands going and looking all around..shit was insaneee. Idk Kris was telling me to sit down but i couldnt..i just cant sit when im drunk so he got all pissed cause i would leave and he would get up and i'd be back with my boys. but there my friends, thats just how i am with them..idk..thats just how it is.. i got in a fight with one of the Montrose guys..and kris was holding me back and hes like nah shes smiling but shes dead ass serious. haha so i threw beer all over him idk i think i hit him..and he came over to apologize and i was like yeah were cool if you give us a ride home so it was 4..and i ate fritos and went to ashleys and ziggy was passed out but ashley wasnt there? hah she came later and we woke up at like 12..i went to get my lip repierced but i need more money..so idkk OoO and Friday Kris woke me up at like 12 and came over and hung out until he had to go to work..and Tee came over and went to DunkinDonuts and then to giant? to hang outt? haha idk i saw kris..

I dont really remember the last time i wrote and all the stuff i did inbetween. Last sunday i think..i went and got my bellybutton pierced twice and this thing in my lip..but its not my lip..its complicated if somebody would teach me how to put pictures on this shit i would show you all. After me and felton got that done mike took us to dunkin donuts to see ash and then he dropped us off at wegmans to meet candice and we left with Kris and idk 3 montrose guys..we were hungry so we drove to montrose, we chilled for awhile and went home and idk over the week at some point me and felton went over to Cyles and hung out with chris and kris and the next day which was friday.. Kyle, Tilton and some black kid? picked me up and we got a 30pk and went to steves and tilton took me to get ashley and we went to cyles and hung out with kris and him..we left at like 12? idk we went with the regular boys and tripped. Maybe this wasnt friday cause today is friday? but i passed out and kyle and ashley woke me up at 8 to get beer by 10 i was smashed and passed out..me and ashley slept till 5pm. got up and were really confused as to how we were in bed and everything so we woke kyle up and went to the bar where ashley discovered the writing all over her face hah then we walked to ashleys and ate and went to Tinas and to mcdonalds and jennas real quick..then to a hotel party..I was home early, but 1:30 cause the next day was thanksgiving..Thanksgiving was good..me and my mom cooked like all day and after dinner kris called and was like you wanna hang outtt? i did but it was complicated so like 2 hours later i went over to his house and we hung out for a whilee and i came home and fell asleep to some movie..Todays deidres birthday so i just talked to her for a while..and idk drinking tonight..

and I dare you to forget the marks you left across my neck from those nights when we were both found at our best now I could make this obvious, and you...you can deny me all in one breath.you could just shrug me off your shoulders.."just forget me. its that simple."

i havent writing in a while, but my birthday was good. We went out to dinner, and i got home and opened presents and ziggy called and asked if i was ready and i said no so like 3min. later Kyle called and was like yoo were outside. haha assholes. They took me to Lanes and we got a few bottles and got drunk with them and then went to tavias, where everybody was. Mike had to take Beth home so i went with them and played with his gun ahha.Mike brought me backk and idk i spent the night at kyles. I didnt drink again till sunday we got bottles and 40's but the cops got called and oh man. I dont know what happened during the week, im failing 3 classes but it was a 4 day week so sweet ass. Thursday night we went to a few diffrent parties..hahah they were real nice :) I was pretty damn drunk so people were like danika lets go buy beer im like yeah yeah ok, and go to get up and fall back down so they carried me. UGH then fucking..were upstairs and these 2 girls come up to kyle and are like yo theres some girl looking for you upstairs, he looks at me and im just staring at him and hes like i think its Keri come with me..so i walk outside with him and that stupid fucking cunt is there, yeah she fallowed Kyle there? i dont even wanna get into it..so i was kyles buddy, his drinking buddy all night as he called me..but thats just complicated. Idk i was hyped up cause Corey let me have some of his shit..and at like 3, me and kyle got taken to his house and the fucking cops wouldnt leave the car alone..when we were in the car i saw them twice and then we got outta the car and walked up kyles driveway and kyle had to piss on his housee so the cop circled twice more during that..ahh i hung out with ashley the next day till like 10 and i had comp. the next day at 6am so i went home, and we won CNY ..first place again babyyyy. we got back to the school at like 8:30 and Tee drove me home and i got ready and Cindy picked me up at 10 and we went to some party and played liqour pong..cause thats high class. They took me home at like 3:30am and i slept till 6pm and woke up with phone numbers on me? yeah ahha idk..didnt go to school today, cause im way to cool..

Nobody know's where my Johnny has gone. But Judy left the same time. Why was he holding her hand? When he supposed to be mine. It's my party and I'll cry if I want to. Cry if I want to, cry if I want to. You would cry too, if it happened to you. Play all my records keep dancing all night. But leave me alone for a while. Til' Johnny's dancing with me, I've got no reason to smile. It's my party and I'll cry if I want to. Cry if I want to, cry if I want to. You would cry too, if it happened to you. Judy and Johnny just walked through the door. Like a queen with her king. Oh, what a birthday surprise Judy's wearing his ring. It's my party and I'll cry if I want to. Cry if I want to, cry if I want to. You would cry too, if it happened to you. It's my party and I'll cry if I want to. Cry if I want to, cry if I want to. You would cry too, if it happened to you My birthday is oh so deffintly in 3.5 hours

I just wrote this and it erased it. cool. Alright so..i think its wednesday i left school early..shits boring. butt if its wednesday that means MY BIRTHDAY is in 2 days. But like always holidays are fucked up.. i'm grounded cause i didnt come home halloween night. Saturday was a regular party night and halloween was fun until i drank wayyy to much. I think i broke my knuckle? and i miss how shit used to be with ____. I just look back over the summer and even like a month ago and thats all i can picture is those good nights. I can feel your pain, just look at my wrists.

Alright.. SaturdayNight-kegger. SundayNight- usually nothing, cause we have a whole week of school right? nah wrong. Travis was like you wanna go out? i was like nope i cant i have school tommrow and i dont have aderol or anything to get me threw tommrow but hes nah i'll be at your house in a min. so we drove around and ended up at Ashleys, woke her up, but we bought her beer. We hung out there and i got smasheddd..i puked and travis took me home at like 5? I came home and slept for an hour or so, i slept threw my alarm so my mom woke up and i quickly got ready, I go to change and i take off my shirt and um i have multiple swastikas and graphitti on my stomach(thanks guys, i love you 2) Jess picked me up and i slept on Kris all the way to school and wow still smashed in school. Beth jumped on my back and i layed in the hall for a while just laughing, after the alcohol wore off i just had a huge fucking hangover. After school i called my dad and he took me to McDonalds :) I came home and slept. Tuesday- hm.. school is gay. But cheerleading got cancelled cause of the gay snow. Me and jess walk out to the south and jess cleans her car off with a plastic bag? yeah thats hot. So we were driving and theres large fucking tree laying across the road, so we got out and moved that shittt BUT then when i get home theres a tree on my house? wtf? karma? i think not. We had a fire alarm in the freeezing rain today, so we walk outside and then they call us back in to the large gym so i met brenden and ashley and walked with them and sat on this mat with them.. and brended taught me a story and how to spell 'Loose' in my calculator x3. And then kris came over and pushed ashley off and sat next to me and like he still didnt say anything about everything..but i dont think he knows that i know? haha whatever. I told you, you didnt know me. I know myself and i know what so many people have told me. But now you get why i said no? saving you. Jess, amy and me talked in English today and since that whole quote ''If you cant beat them ..join them'' ..I've been hurt to many times and been let down so fuck it..i'll be the one to hurt. haha im gonna be a guy? chea. :)

Alright, yesturday..Had gay school then gymnastics which nobody did anything we just layed in the foam pit and talked x3. i liked it. These girls on my squad needed a hookup so after aero we went to the mall and i got them a dutch and 20bag..I came home and took a superr quick shower and went to Ashleys with kyle, keri, frankie, josh, tina,corey and some random girl-we drank some 12packs and then josh and frankie left to get a bottle and they were taking awhile so ziggy and kyle went after them and MustangMike stopped by so they smoked and we were bored so we decided to go find a party. We figured we would stop up at ChinaTown and see what was good so we totally were lost until Brandan,Donald and tavyaw come were there godamn trucks booming down the street and they were like yeah we just came from there..So they turned around and we all went. It was really fun. JeanMarc took us home at like 130. We went to ashleys and we had drunken talks and we got a few more beers and Mel came over for a little and Frankie and Josh came with beerssss. So we drank and smoked out of Sunshine x3. The new buwl. Idk me and ashley passed out at like 6? yeah i have no clue i woke up and went to Keris and then home and cheered at the game at M-E.Which sucked i only cheered half the game and then i sat with Jill cause i felt like absolute shit and couldnt move or breath. I came home and went out with Caity and now were getting bottles for tonight. Kris said he wanted to hang out when he got off work, I was with him at ChinaTown.which was gravy. Btw..The cool kid that doesnt have balls to sign your name. You have no clue who i've been kissing so cheaa good call? you can deff. get mono diffrent ways to you dumbass and saying people who get it deserve it is just immature and ridiculous. Rethink your priorities.

Thanks to those who hated me you made me a stronger person Thanks to those who loved me you made my heart grow fonder Thanks to those who cared you made me feel important Thanks to those who entered my life you made me who I am today Thanks to those that left you showed me that nothing lasts forever Thanks to those who stayed you showed me the true meaning of friendship Alright, so this morning the lovely Jess picked me up and we went and got Jenna, Ashley and Kris. I was on time today for school for the 2nd time this year..OH SHIT OH SHITT. We had to dress up for cheerleading and we had roses, i felt like i was going to prom hah.. anyways.School was gay as usually and after we had practice,another peprally and team dinner after that we went to get our hair done (where i meet 2 of the coolest girls ever!!) I dropped Tee off at Leighs and came home at like 9:30. The whole big deal with U-E and STAC is fucking retarded! Im not even getting into it..just that all the squads got split into divisions because stupid fucking U-E won the case..Well seeing as how its Ziggys birthday theres a party tonight, which me and Tee are dressing up all thuggggg and gonna go drinkk and party x3. hah yeah and tommrow the team has a cerfew of..8:30 hahah gotta love it. STAC is sunday. be there or be square niggas.

I dont jump around when I go to shows, I must be EMO!! http://emosong.ytmnd.com/

Alright, so my throat is killing me and a few girls on the squad have strep throat so im pretty i do to.ew. But anyways, i just got home from babysitting.. Thursday night was good for the most part. Jenna, Ash, Beth and me were at Ashleys for a little while but we left at like 7, ash was upset and just wanted to leave so we decided to walk a little before the party started. We were walking down the street and we saw a bunch of guys chillen by there cars and what not so me and Jenna start talking mad shit just messing around..and i hear soo thats danikaaaaa i turn around and theres shane and a bunch of other guys so we walk over there and then daquan and some other guy come and join us.. haha i was sitting on shanes car and Jenna like put her head between my legs and the guy was like ohh shittt ya'll bi? i was like hm..jenna are we bi? shes like cheaa! we had some fun with that kid..haha he was interesting x3. idk really what happened after that ashley found out keri was around and she went running to fuck her up so i went running after her screaming down fucking grand ave. people seriously thought i was chasing her to fuck her up haha :P Anyways we left and alot of shit happened eventually we ended up at brendens and got a few bottles and beer and partyed there which wow i cannot explain. We got home at like 4:30, brenden came over and i passed out on the floor with him. p.s i got some pictures from that night, if i can get em' i'll put them up. 3 girls :O oh shit oh shit x3. The next day we woke up at like 11 still drunk and we came to my house and showered and i went to cheerleading at 3..idk

No school again, i'm much to cool for it..you would think people would think that its weird that most of my friends dont come to school on the same days :P Well anyways heres some pictures http://www.pressconnects.com/photogallery/cheer2005/index.shtml# check em' out or die.

WE JUST WON STAC!!! WE BEAT U-E on that fucking mat that they just had to have!I fucking love you girls..The season might of had its bad times but godamn i couldnt have asked for a better squad x3. Yesturday in U-E's gym practicing for the first time ever with the fucking blue mat, Jill says.. ''Im gonna dare to say it in the house of the Tigers, we will beat them tommrow.'' DEDICATED DEDICATED DOWN RIGHT DEDICATED YOU CHECK IT OUT YOU CHECK IT OUT .DEDICATED. ;)

Now that i quit token..I see all my other addictions. Im addicted. Im scard to wait, I live for my next hit as soon as i take it im thinking about how to get my next one. Nobody understands as soon as you take it, the way you feel, how everything changes for the better. Just one hit, i need it. Everytime i take one in i promise myself its the last but i never stop. I tell myself i dont need it over and over again but im always on it when im spitting out those words. When i lean my head over i see my reflection in the tiny mirror between the lines and the white dots that slightly blew out of those perfectly set lines and i see another person looking back.

I have mono!.. again! my doctor says its cause i like to kiss. hehe. The psyco foreign bitch that took my blood couldnt hit my vein if her life depended on it and she just kept stabbing me. p.s I hope you know how much you hurt me, you took away everything that wasnt yours to take away. You said sorry but you did it again and again. You said you knew how much it hurt me yet you did it over and over. I cant ignore it, i've tried. I dont understand how you can hurt someone you love. What i really dont understand is how you dont care you have no regret.Its like your not human.You ruined alot for me..congratulations bitch. I cant come and talk to you about it, tell you that you hurt me..thats how it was the first time but now its much to late for that and thats just not how the game is played,its played quiet and sneaky..just like the stuck up bitches that we are.

How come whenever something good happens its followed by something shitty? Thursday was the peprally hah FucLee stole the wildcat head and ran randomly around the gym x3. Friday was good, went to school and practice after but we didnt practice at all we just sat around for 2 hours and talked and then i went home, and went to the bonfire and cheered there, it was actually pretty fun. I went home and got into a fight with my mom, she said she was gonna put me on pins if i left, haha so i left. I met Ryan and Corey at the underpass and went to Keris house(a girl they met that night) Got kicked out of that house before we even got all the way in, ziggy went home..me and ryan went with him and met a few kids on the street corner, we chilled with them until corey came to get us..we went back to Keris house and the lovely girl was drunk as shit..she told us her sister was coming home so we had to leave for a little but her sister already knew kyle was with her and she was allowed to have girls over so me and her became friends real quick like :) Kyle told me he had to talk to me, and i sat on her bed and he told me that he was sorry for everything with caity and i should be mad at him and he would do anything to make it up to me. idk..we left her house after lieing threw my ass to her mom to let her come with me, we went to kyles for the night..we all just fucked around and whatever till like 5, woke up at 9..i went back to Keris at 10:30 and called my mom to come get me, i went home, changed and went to the homecoming parade and game. Got home and went out again to ashleys and drank and kyle came over there..and idk passed out at like 5, got up at 9 and went to preform at the breast cancer walk thingy.Zach picked me up and drove me home, i fell asleep and when i woke up i had no fucking clue where i was or what day it was? haha Dee called me and i talked to her for a while shes comeing in 11 days!! wow shits pissing me off.bye