I can't fucking take this anymore! I can't sit there and help him with his situation with her if I still haven't let go of my feelings. It hurts too much. I want him to be happy I do, but I am so damn selfish and I want him to be happy with me. I want to be the one he thinks about when he first wakes up, and the last one he thinks about before he goes to bed. I just want to be his everything. Like make him happy, dry away his tears when hes sad. I don't know why its so hard to let go. This is not how I am. I should know better then to give my heart to another boy. Last time I did that it just got broke. I can't take that feeling again. That pain. It is almost untollerable. It just fucking hurts. I would give him everything he could ever dream of, and more. He will never be treated the way I treated him again. He will never feel that kind of love. Hes going to look back and realize that he turned his back on love. That his friends dictated his feelings for me, that he listened to his friends when they told him that he shouldn't be with me. I odn't want him to ever feel the pain that I am feeling right now. And yet, I do. I want him to suffer the same why he is making me suffer. I want someone to break his heart into a million pieces so he knows how it feels to still love them with every small piece. DAMN YOU FOR NOT LETTING ME GO! You had to go and toy with my emotions like that. WTF were you thinking? Well, I hope you had your fun.. Just look at what you did to me...