Isn´t it strange how you want some things so bad you have to think about them constantly? How every moment is stained by the absence of this one single thing, trivial as it might be. How you really believe you´ll be happy forever, or at least for the next month or so, if only you manage to get hold of it somehow. And as soon as you have it, it is no longer worth a thing. You might just as well do without it, thank you very much, it is nothing special, really. And then the unbearable emptiness until something new comes around, something that would upgrade your life into spheres previously unknown. I want to beat myself around the head for my spoiled shallow condition that will never ever let me value all the good things that just seem to cross to my way, but I guess it won´t help much.