I hate liking someone who doesnt like me back.

how come for a long time everything is so great than it all comes crashing down and i end up with nothing? everything is going wrong wrong wrong and its not just a bad day

fuck im at medbhs its like 1 school starts tuesday fuck

I'm happpy :)

ook so theres this guy at bally hes like 18 ya SEXI he always smiles at me and watever and me im shy i dont do anything back lol. i saw him like 600 times before, and thursday i was like k im finally going to say something. yeah well, his girlfriend was there.maybe its his sister cuz she does look younger? lolwhatever I see him every thursday. friday i went to brittanyss and we went to the fair with leena and met up with people there lol i puked like 2x bc we went on so many rides haha it was an awesome time. at 12 we went back to britts with leena lol we watched teh sixth sense scarry movie.mhm we woke up at like 1 lol.ya than i went home. i picked medbh upa tlike 8 saturday and we went back to the fiar till like 12.ya met ppl went on rides got stalked.than we went to burger king lol tyler and that one kid where there me and medbh didnt realize burger king was closed so i ran 2 laps round the drive thru cuz i had to go pee and i jus petted the llmas that were dirty. than kyle and sum niggah kid showed up and they let them in and nOT ME. wtf. ne ways i wlaked thru the drive thru and got my food thru the window lol this guy on a mustang thought i was nuts watever fuck you. medbh stayed at my house we sneaked out OMG WE BADD ASS? lol um than we came back and felll asleep sumwhere um than medbh and me went to church to sign up for community service and than backt o her house and we slept there and watched tv... and ate pizza sumwhere now im here hello :) as for my love life how do u tell sum1 that u wished all their attention was on u and not their past? well i cant. but than again thats not fair and selfish. but its what i want. ur in this weird situation yet u love the person more than they know think about them more than they know and everything reminds you of them. you would spend every second talking to them. whatever i give up again like always. u cant be there for them when their not letting you or even giving u the time of day when u culd block out the whole word and just focus on teh one thing that matters in this world which is him.

all i want is someone to call up and be like HI WANNA HANG OUT and hold hands with him and he'll always be there for me whenever i need him just someone to hang out with and feel the same way i do

lol i think i might like someone HM

hhi today was pretty sweet considering the fact i have a cotton ball shoved up my ear for like 1 week ANYWAYS! tmrw im going back to my gay CLASSES ive missed them like eight times and tuesday IM GETTING MY HAIR CUTTED AND COLORED AND HIGHLIGHTED OH DAMN IM EXCITED and im going to the beach wensday and hanging iwht my bffffffff thursday and seeing this girl i havent seen for like 2 yrs on friday WOOO. today evan came over with MY FAVE FOOD. way to my heart IS FOOD. lol my ear hurt like hell and was bleeding cuz i wasnt suppose to sleep on it o well and um we went in my backyard on the hammock and laid there for like 2 hrs CHHIT CHATTING. than my ear got better and we went and rode the pace bus to this ghetto town with the mexicans lol than we got off at a random stop and went to a mexican store lmao halarouis. hes like my best friend im happy i met him. YUh. we stopped at block buster and got anchor man or watever haha funny movie. than we ent into my hot tub and played water cheess? lolll than he went home and i went to work out as for my love life im not sure i feel the same anymore hes beeing different now and I DONT LIKE IT. whatever

i hate being lied to cant wait till he fucks up and feellike shit again woopy. today i woke up at 6 AM i ran 5 miles ate yogurt talked to my muff and took a shower did my hair went to this 5 star resort to swim and tan ended up in the ER and my head hurts like hell i also won a mini ipod today in pink its pretty right now i feel like laying here and dying i got caleld back to a beauty pagent i was going to go do rehearsal today and watever but didnt happen. i can always go during the week. the shows not like till next month. my dads mean. he hates me. :)

was fun at the bonfire with evan and cold and whatever today im haning with my ghetto friends goodbye

iw ent to th ebeach with evan at 12 it was fun the end. today blows life sux im going to bed

HEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY OK SO TODAY I WOKE UP and jack was at my houuuuuuuse it started raining at like 10 holy shit hurricane came and went lol scary shit uh we watched movies on our BACKUp battery shindig so the tv still worked yet the power was out lol than the pretty sun came out yeah so we decided to go surfinggg man it was awesome xcpt the waves werent so we sat there lol made a sand castle sum fat lady stepped on it made another one and swam than riley showed up with her friends. and we went to lunch at bk. I GOT A CROWN! YEAH from jack aw it was so sweet. than we rann to jewel to ride shopping carts no walmart around GAY HUH I KNOW. we went and bought gummie bears and ate them on the way to Evan's Rileys friend, haha he lives in his garage cuz hes like 19 and doenst go to college so his parents kicked him out. haha thats them being horny anyways we went swimming in their pool than we had dinner with his family lol his dads halarouis he kept trying to prove that Evan was gay cuz he hasnt hung out with any girls lmao yeah uh than we all walked to my house. my family had friends over so they had a bbq. and we went swimming. me and riley and doods in boxers HOTTNESS lol we got bored and took a blowhorn and rode my stepdads golf cart on our golf course where other ppl were, my dads friends and drove passed and BLOWHORNED THEM lmfao oh man OLD PEOPLE AND BLOWHORNS ARE PRICELESS UMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM than we ate and everyone left at like 7 and went to workout cuz this hot bod needs to stay in shape YA KNOW mmmmmm took a shower ate sum more and tonight at 12 im meeting evan at the beach :) how sweet ik hes awesome. funny like me. WOOP!. school starts sooon BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAa

hm im missing someone i thought id never miss lifes weird

I hate trying to get close to a guy I give up. today me medbh and uh ppl lit fireworks and smoke bombs haha it was sweet. I went to see dark water last night it was sad and scary too. Mmm we tried walking to wendys yet we got to craigs and decided it was too far so we stayed outside craigs while he called his friends thanwe went home and hung out that's all. I am not in a happy mood these last days I guess its bc sum makes it go bad all the time bc I excpt sumthing better from him and get the worst baa watever.

HI k so friday was our party lol ppl came over at like 5 and me and medbh were runnign around getting ready lemme just say WE LOOKED PRETTY HOTT. than uh everyone came over at like 8ish and yeah. ok mike is gay. serouisly wat faggot comes to a party for like 2 minutes and leaves with his niggah friends??!? he knos i like him prob doesnt like me but its okay. um yeah we juked we drank we partied? until like 12. than ppl left. and they went skinny dipping in the pool haha. yeah. mmm a lot of people hooked up sum girl came out from behind a tree with grass stains on her jeans shes like O M G faggot. yesterday it was gay. i was tired. mad. sad. my mom came to pick me up and i went with her to get my grandma. we went to eat at boston MARKET MM YEAH. uh my grama isnt feeling well. it makes me sad :( bc i already lost my grampa. yuh uh than later that night i was picked up by jordan and his friends. hooked up with one of his friends at the beach HELL YUH. um than i went home feeling like shit. as for now. life blows. and theres nothing to look forward to. and i cut my hair. goodbye.