I spoke of people not wanting to be around me. I could feel the tension when I saw two of my old friends today. "At least I belive." A slap to the face, I wish I was away from here already. These people hate me, My company is like poisen to them I am as a plague. Some say they like me and they want to be around me, but it doesnt seem like it, it seems like I am their next project, next conversion, next hopless cause. Well I was one of those people once. They are good, but I understand too much about it to have that good feeling that comes from being the victem. I just want to be left alone, I want to be hated, I want to go to that hell that everyone already belives I am Damned to. Some have said that I have touched their lives lives in a positive way, therefore the fact that I have gone the opposite way that they have belived because of me hurts them. I didnt mean any of it, I didnt mean to try to control your life in any such matter, you make your own choices not me, so why not let me make mine? If you want to know what I am thinking right now listen to the song "Hey There Delilah" by Plain White T's. I'm gunna cry. It makes me sad, and happy, it makes me alive just like she does. I dont know why I seem so angry, I'm not angry, I love everyone, I really do, I love you all, no exceptions, even those that make me feel the worst inside, I love you. Promise.