i write to remember

I'm getting by pretty easily. I'm really not the greatest friend in the world. I haven't really done anything mean in a while, but it's the truth. I'm not a good person. I’m not good enough and I'm sick of people criticizing me for it. I wish you would all just back off. Actually, nobody has really said anything about me not being good enough in a long time. I’m not so sure why I just brought that up. I don’t really cuss anymore. I haven’t for a really long time. And that’s good. Today was okay, I guess. This is so…..horrible. This isn’t a good entry at all. I’m not happy with it, I don’t know, I don’t really have anything to write about, so I’m just writing down random thoughts that are popping up, and nothing seems right, because this isn’t what I have been thinking about all day. Sometimes I have these perfect entries in my head that I think about all day long, and then when I finally get home, and I can write them down, I can’t remember one thing I thought about. It’s bad, very bad.
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i hate it when i have what i want to write in my head, but as soon as i open the blank white box to pour it all out,
my mind goes empty.

it's so annoying :(