i am amazed. When you have life on two feet, have the world all figured out, there. The adrenalin rush you get when you're standing at the edge of a cliff. Even better, the edge of a snow moutain, that -will- avalanche. With you on it. That adrenalin rush. Like ketamine. Next thing you know, you're on the ground. Stabbed in the chest. BUT SHE'S MEANT TO BE ON A BUZZ! It's not the downer yet, just a bad "buzz". No...More lost words. Words unspoken, which should've been a long time ago. My speech for him. "Everyone I love now, I'll always love". Those types of things. It was meant to be something like: I don't know if I tell you this enough, but you've made a huge impact on my life whether I like to believe it or not. I love you, and always will despite the bad choices I think you make. I -always- wish you were here with me because ya make me happy. Not the fake happy. I mean it. Sometimes I wish you would shut the fuck up and understand. You're only human, not Angel. I seem to think the latter. I want ya to know I'm here, and if you ever need someone, at least there's me. I'll probably be no more use than a hug for ya, but I'll be here. Somewhere along those lines. Straight to the point, simple, but meaningful. Hopeful meaning. Lost non-hopeful meaning that doesn't count. Goodnight.