THIS JUST IN. BRIGHT AND EARLY NEWS AT 4PM. WE HAVE REPORTS OF A MAN YELLING ABOUT SANTA IN FRONT OF HIS HOUSE. YES, IT SEEMS THAT HE IS YELLING BECAUSE OF THE SHINGLES ON HIS HOUSE. MORE AT THE SHINGLES. HERE IS WHAT HE IS SAYING... WHY ARE THE SHINGLES CRACKING LIKE THAT? THEY AREN'T SUPPOSED TO DO THAT. WAS SOMEONE UP THERE WALKING ON THOSE SHINGLES. WHY THE FUCK WOULD SOMEONE BE WALKING UP THERE. SHIT! WE SHOULD CALL THE SHINGLE PLACE AND GET SOME FUCKING ANSWERS. SHIT... Obviously my neighbor has never heard of Santa, He is a dumbass