well bryan broke up with me because people are spreading rumors at his school that i still cut and i was a skurf and all this so i was like whatever...i was really upset at first...but then i talked to anna and molly..and...they helped soooo omuch they are sweethearts....the thing that helped me the most was listeing to the chanukah songs by adam sandler...but what i noticed throughout this relationship with bryan is that i compare everyone with matt...and im thinking matt wouldve called me or matt wouldve dont this matt wouldnt of done that...and the number one thing i think of it matt was the only one that didnt judge me and stayed with me even though i did cut...and the reason bryan broke up with me was because i thought i did..then i realized how much i really miss matt...and he could have been "the one" ya know? because we understood each other...we were...idk we were "matt and sam" and i miss it.. and it makes me mad that he doesnt even want to come back to visit us..its like..now that he lives in HAWAII he is too good for us t-town people ...and it makes me soooo mad because he only called me when it was my bday..im wondering if he's gunna call for xmas...because i really do still love him..and like i said, i ALWAYS will...but yea im sure he's moved on...and i have too for the most part..and thats what we need to do but i dont want to like...never talk to or see him again...i still want to be friends..but idk...we'll see