Whew...today was quite a day. This morning I woke up at 6:06 and my mom was like, "HURRY UP! YOU ONLY GOT 4 MINUTES TO GET READY!" Cuz I always leave the house for the bus at 6:10 so I woke up and I was BURNING UP!!! But I ignored it, so I went to the bathroom and on the way there my vision started to go black and I started to get dizzy and I started wobbling around and accidentally kicked my dog's food all over the place. When I got out the bathroom I started breathing really hard so I ignored that too...but when I got to my room, I couldn't see at all and I couldn't breathe and the next thing I know I wake up on the floor with my mom begging me to wake up. I got up and she told me to lay down and that I wasn't going to school today. I thought, "there is no way I'm missing school after I worked so hard on my research paper..." So I basically forced myself to go to school, Maria and Reyna gave me a ride. I had a really bad headache all day long. It was annoying, but again, I ignored that too. or at least I tried...At lunch today Natalie found a cute little black and red spider. I fell in love with it and picked it up and I named it Kevin Dubrow. I went to go let him go but when it was on the leaf of the bush it was walking away but then it turned around and looked at me with it's cute little blue eyes and so I told him to go but he just stood there. I extended my hand out for it and it hopped onto my hand, so I was like, "aww...he wants me..." So I had him for basically all of lunch until Moo made me let him go. Later, Jaclyn wrote me a story about Kevin... It may not have seemed like a big deal (probably cuz she let it go rather fast) but Natalie saw my wrist at lunch. Yes, you know I'm stupid. And what's even worse is that I'm so friggin' hypocritical when it comes to that. It kills the crap out of me but sometimes I just don't think at all and the next thing I know there are flowy red lines on my arms...So I guess I got another thing to pray for...I still think I'm stupid. But one thing I learned at faith formation was that God forgives you for no matter what sin you commit but you have to forgive yourself...That's what I haven't done...I haven't forgave myself for what I've done in the past. But dude, if you were me, I mean, I bet you wouldn't forgive yourself either. I'm pretty sure I've committed a mortal sin, and I am DEEPLY terrified of that. I have been so scared/ashamed of that, that I haven't been able to confess it...but now here's the perfect time. Monday there's a confession session (hey, that rhymed. haha) or something at church, so I'm gonna go to confession and I'm gonna tell that priest EVERYTHING! I've been praying for it so let's just hope God gives me the strength to tell it. .:EDIT:. Party's tomorrow...so far it sounds like it's gonna be pretty good. Moo can't go though...he has to go with his family to Mission Viejo...Jaclyn's sleeping over (Chloe most probably is as well) so I won't be able to go to the soup kitchen with Angie and everyone on Sunday. But if Chloe sleeps over, then she could come to Praise Night with me and she could get her brick! Haha.