Well, life... Ryan has a girlfriend. Her name is Kelly. She's one of my really good friends. I have realized that I don't have most the same interests in music that Ryan does. He likes a lot of underground bands. And emo bands that aren't popular ... and stuff like that. It makes me sad (not his music selection) that we don't have as many connections that I would like. Like, if we ever went out, what would we talk about; who's converse are cooler than the others'. It's just not what I would like. I mean I still like him. I have to still like him. But oh well, life goes on. Speaking of life, I flirt too much. The other day, my friend Sean kissed me. (on the lips) I don't know why I let him. But I now have this guilty-ness inside of me because he's one of my best friends brother. (yeah...not good) And well, it will NEVER happen again. Unless I truly develop something for Sean. But it's very unlikely... WHY? Because I'm not interested and I never will be. I'm sooo totally fucked up. But I do like this other guy. I've liked him for a while. I don't know his name. Or what grade he's in. He has dark brown hair that's slightly above his shoulders (I think) and he's tall. And he's really really fucking cute. I wanna go up to him and be like: "Dude, you're the fucking hottest guy in school." And now, I'm helping Willy with his problems at 1 am!!!!