I have felt recently as if i could bypass the rest of my highschool life completely, and start completely new in college. It is not college so much that i am looking forward to, but the entire "bypass highschool" part. I love many of my friends no doubt, but the core group of friends that I usually spend time with during school has caught me wishing for a change. Though i may appear to fit in with them, i really feel as if I'm drifting further and further from their mentality. I'd much rather spend my time with other friends, but I do not have the heart to admit my change of thought to my current group, nor the confidence to make the full transition to the other group. Lunch is no longer enjoyable; it has been replaced with the sophmoric actions concerning shared iPods, and the drama dealt from not telling friends certain things. I can't handle it anymore. Winter break was enormously stress free and fun. I hung out with people who had a good time, and didnt let potential "drama" get in the way. As cliche as the entire drama subject sounds, I really can't take much more of it. The tangling web of phone calls and decieving subjects. I just wish there was a way I could completely skip the social tribulations concerning these friends, or finally start hanging out with a new group. As of right now, that's what I really need. Life is too short to be spent unhappy or stressed, and although I'm generally happy about my life right now, I cannot say the same about my specific friends. I just wish a pain free transition was actually possible. I've made a number of new friends since winter break. They're fantastic-and I love hanging out with them; as they're intelligent, understanding, and don't fret about superficial things. I just can't bring myself to make the complete transition into my group. Perhaps this hesitance is on grounds of acceptance? I'm really not sure how I would be welcomed; an outsider is what I fear. In other news: Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless is amazing, and could very well be a new favorite. Spencer burned me Nuetral Milk Hotel's "In the Aeroplane Over the Sea" and I am madly in love with it. Yet another long weekend is approaching, and with the exception of Chadd's party, I am not concrete of my plans. UPDATE After talking to Jon, I think I might just go for it. What can I lose? Even awkwardness in a new group would beat everything going on in mine.