Not that you care but I'm alone tonight.. Every night but that's not because I care. I don't care. About you, about them; I don't care about anything. I wish I were drunk right now but I'll get over it, I wish I were anything but what I am but I can't be bothered. I don't want to do anything but hate you. I hate you every night. I bet you'd laugh right now if you knew you made me angry. Angry to tears. So angry I can't think straight and words are disconnected from the outside world. My anger stays in me. I hate every scar you've caused but I'll always love the feel of you causing them..If I said I wanted you would you come back? Fuck you, I hate you tonight. I'm free tonight. We all know that's a lie..Bet you'd laugh if you knew you were the lie I told myself. I know you would; I try to pretend its not real all the same. ..I love you.. Not that you care. Jillian