as i sit beneath the willow seeming to weep along with it i realize the consequences in life. they must mean something whether it be relevant or not, they must like these trees that uphold what's left of me comforting protection from the harsh reality the hell we call a life so one must pick themselves up and process contemplate your existence, why are you here? one must assume we are here for some purpose i agree with that concept but for what purpose? one only has one life time or so we think, due to karma that may be altered the cycle of suffering... but one must also realize that their hell isn't as bad as it may seem yes, there are its down spots...a lot of them...but what are we to do "pick ourselves up"...easier sad than done usually requiring the assistance of another i'm grateful i've had that just as these willows support my very existence now life, ha, so fragile yet so misunderstood how could we ever take care of something so inexorbable as our lives if we do not understand why we are here these willows must know, for they have seen many winters and should surely know but yet, they are only trees says the layman how could we comprhend what trees understand and what they do not they must feel pain...they live, do they not? just as my cousin must understand but cannot speak for he's in a comma yet he continues to see and hear, like a tree may be able to, but still cannot speak his thoughts of the world one must sit and wonder... wow, deep as i've been in a while, oh well, we'll see what happens. get to see my love tomorrow and can't wait. Serenity