Trying to stay positive all the time has its downsides. Thats how I got out of my rut, I grabbed on to something and forced myself to stay positive on every situation. But thats hard, humans cry because they need to let emotion out, they need to vent. By pushing that back all the time you get times like......now. Where your entire world crashes for no reason at all, and you start to blame yourself for everything thats eating away at you. Because alot of it is your fault anyway.

You never know when they could go, but it happens..everyday, and I take it all for granted. It happend a few weeks ago in the most horrible way possible. I didnt even know what to say to trevor..but I love you bud. Im so thankful for what I have, how far Iv come, and who I have. But I dont know how to tell them. I wish I did...... I love you mom I love you dad I love you cambria I love all my friends ~mike~