i think i had a dream during my four hour nap about kohl's boy, and that i had asked him for coffee and it was just so simple talking to someone i liked for once. i haven't been able to feel anything for anyone stronger than what i had felt for evan until our breakup and it scares me a little sometimes. i'm young and i know it's a phase and that i'd rather find joy in the simple things. i can't say i miss feeling that awful pang in my stomach thinking about it all. a lot of things are happening. i just really need a good cry.