i dont even know where to start.. so i guess i will just start with i'm sorry. i'm sorry for everything that i put you through. i know that i caused you a lot of pain.. but just know that that was never my intention. i never meant to hurt you. i care about you so much.. and i love you so much as a person.. i'm just sorry that i didn't love you the way that you loved me. the way that i treated you makes me feel disgusting. i thought that after what Raymond did to me.. i would treasure the next guy that gave me his heart. i really disappointed myself with you. i know that i could've treated you so much better. you deserved so much better. you are the first guy that i have ever been with.. that i could actually tell cared about me. you were nothing but perfect to me.. and i let you down. you deserve someone that is going to love you as much as you love them. you need someone that will treat you as good as you treat them.. i am just so sorry that i couldn't be that person. i can't believe that i am actually going to pass up a guy like you. i must be fucking crazy. i guarantee one day.. i will really realize what i lost.. and i will be a complete mess... but by then you will have moved on and found someone that's perfect for you. People search their whole lives to find someone like you. I was lucky enough to have you be part of mine. I just don’t appreciate you as much as I should.. and you deserve better than that. You shouldn’t have to wait around for me to appreciate you… so I am going to let you go. If we are meant to be together.. we will get back together in the future if the time is right. i ove you.