I feel so empty again. I never know why I feel this way. My life could be going fine and suddenly i am swallowed up by the thick shroud of lonelyness and emptyness. I Stare at my wall, I see patterns, usually of memories, memories best forgotten. I try to Make myself feel better, Youve got so much going for you! Why cant you see it! but I cant, All I see is the stereotypes taking form in my twisted social life, Everyone is so fucking cliche'. Why the fuck does anyone care what anyone else thinks. Just be yourself and stop pretending. I have so much to say and I am afraid to say it. I sit in my room, feel the fretboard vibrating in my hand, I try to release the pain, but its such a slow process. I shouldnt be in pain, Ive escaped from what still haunts me. I miss my sister, She needs me, Se is so young an she already has to Try to take on the world by herself, I havent seen her in three years, i bet she is about 7 now. Plus going from total freedom to having to ask to do everything, and being told no most of the time. The fights, the breakups, all of it. All this shit bothers me and I try to push it to the back of my mind and smile for my friends. I am not content. I dont think I ever will be Stare at the light on the wall Cause I feel my self sinking in Try not to let myself fall Feel the cold on my skin I want to see blood again But remebered Are promises i made back then god I cant even write right now, This song sucks im giving up on it. I think im just going to sit on here and wait for holly to hop on, she is about the only person right now who isnt being so god damn plastic.