A pain, from deep within. A pain in which i believe, if applied correctly, can bring anyone to ruin. Loneliness. Even those who can have a high enough physical fortitude to withstand exterior pains are subjectable to the pain of loneliness. Inner pain is so much different from exterior pain. Those who can be built like a rock on the outside, can be subjectable to inner pain like any other person. There are people who are hurt so much at times that they grow cold inside, as though staring into their eyes is like seeing the hardest snow of the coldest winter storm. But that is not a defense against internal pains. When people do that, they are taking away a gateway to emotion, to feeling. And when you take away a feeling you take away a definition of life. There is no life in a lack of feeling. And i ask, how is it a defense against something when you are taking away your life? Well, no one is as strong as they can think they are when it comes to internal pains. i find myself to be a very strong person when it comes to emotions and inner feelings. i do not cut the cords of emotions or anything inside of me from my life, i just grow a defense of tolerance. Tolerance, fortitude... It is accessable externally, as well as internally. But it isn't an easy thing to aquire. If it was easy, do you think it would be all that rewarding. The more you can bring yourself to the edge and back, the stronger you can become. With the more experiences, the more you have handled and came back from. i have the internal pain of loneliness. i am so very alone all too much of my time lately. And it is mostely out of my hands. But i am in an internal struggle of my own. My own trial i must pass. A story which is my own. As we all have our own stories. Mine is at a low point. Often finding myself talking with no other. Feeling as though my needs are not addressed as at least would be hoped. Observing the world, seeing everything i want, i wish, i dream. Seeing/hearing other people being addressed without question, where i am alone. It isn't as tragic as it seems, i do have times of days where i have my joy. But with my life, that is so little to a whole day which i have to endure. But as i said, this is my trial. i will succeed in the end. All shall be well, in time. However i am a person who lives life in the present, so the loneliness can get to me at times. At least it end... It is just sad when i feel the loneliness and there is nothing i can do about it...