::Where’s the truth for us to use? All we seem to do is lose, Who we are and how we tried. Are we all the same inside? It’s now or never to decide.:: As I sit here typing away at the keys, I started to think to myself. I think, I may need a life. I rarely go out anymore. Then again, all my friends have abandoned me. Decided that I wasn’t worthy enough to be their friend, so they left me hanging by a tree limb. A tree limb that is so small, it’s going to break at any second. Have ever noticed you go through each day, not… consciously hoping, but somewhere deep down inside of you, somewhere in the far back corner of your mind, you are hoping, praying, wishing, painfully pondering away and not intentionally, staring at the phone. In the hopes that someone WILL call? I did that today. But, see I knew that I was doing it. I also sat at my computer chair hoping that someone would message me. I figure, if my friends wish to play "the game" – that I may as well to. I sat there. Silently, wishing that someone would call me. Of course, I’d never admit that to anyone. Well, besides you. Yes, you. You- the person sitting at your chair staring at the screen, reading what I have to say. Why? Why are you reading this? Do you find it interesting? To read what other people have to say? I, for one don’t really read a lot of people’s diaries on here. (No offense to everyone.) Usually, if I comment. It means I read your diary and found something interesting in it and worthy of my comment to you. So, if you’ve gotten a comment from me- pat yourself on the back. –Wink- Ha. Makes me sound… conceited and stuck up almost, doesn’t it? –Smiles- Anyway, back to what I was saying before. I sat at my computer waiting for someone to message me. And guess what? No one did. I ended up giving in. I figured, since they are all stuck up and obviously don’t consider me a friend that I will message them first. To show that I appreciate them and that I consider them a friend. Hopefully, one day they will do the same. -Laugh- Haha. Yah, sure. Sometimes, I wonder and think to myself why I even bother to fret about this. Why I spend at least an hour a day hoping that someone will message me. Then I quickly realize- I hate being alone. Even if they are technically, not here- in some (can’t find the word that I want to use here to figure it out for yourself –Smiles-) up way, they are. Even if they can’t reach out and give me a hug if I really need one, I know… that most of the people that are on my messenger list’s, even if they don’t talk to me much, they are there for me- when I need to talk to them. That’s a good feeling. Probably, one of the best feelings in the world, knowing that someone out there cares about you and is willing to listen to you and try to help you out. I watched a movie tonight, with my father. It’s called "In America." It’s a sad movie but very good. I usually hate sad movies, because I hate crying. It means that I have to show someone else my emotions and as far as I’m concerned, I’m dead inside. And I shouldn’t be showing anyone, anything, at all. The movie is about a family of four (two young daughters and the mother and father) from Ireland who move to America after they suffer from the lose of their son/brother. The father is an actor and decides that he’ll be able to make it big in some big acting gig. So, he basically moves his entire family across the world to an entirely new place. He doesn’t make it through any auditions at all. On Halloween the two girls decided to go trick-or-treating for the first time, in the building, and they come across one door that says "Keep Out" or something along those lines. But they knock and knock and knock on it until a black man, Meteo, comes to the door to see what all the racket and bothersome was. Immediately the girls and Meteo become friends. Soon, they come to learn that the mother is pregnant but there are some complications. If the baby is born too soon, she might not make it. If the baby is born too late, the mother might not make it. Interestingly enough, the mother’s name is Sarah. –Gasp- She still decides to keep the baby which turns the father, Joe, into a frenzy and he ends up at Meteo’s place and learns that Meteo is dying from AIDS. In the end, the eldest girl has to give the little baby blood for a blood transfusion. At first, the baby doesn’t make any sounds or show any signs of life. Then they show Meteo on his hospital bed and he opens his eyes and says a chant of some sort, and his head falls back onto his pillow. He dies. They go to the baby and she starts to scream and wail and move all about. He died and it brought life. That is a good ending. Oh wait, that’s not how it ends. –lol- The father and the two little girls wave goodbye to the moon (ET like style thing, hard to explain just go and watch the damn movie!) but they are really saying goodbye to Meteo and Frankie (the son/brother). It made me cry. So, it’s a must see movie. I demand you all to go and rent it. Again, I repeat, you must go rent it. It’s called "In America." Okay? Okay thanks. Anyway, what else did I do today? I watched Ginger Snaps II! That movie was good. Really kick ass. I’m afraid to go to sleep, might end up waking up with a werewolf standing over me. –Gasp- -lol- Haha. I’m so funny. –Sigh- Hmm, I didn’t do much of anything else today… Watched the television and played my "Bush Shoot Out" game on the computer, talked to a few people on AIM/MSN/Yahoo, went to the store with my dad- rented movies, got chocolate milk and then went to KFC and got supper. –Smiles- Food makes me sick. –Gags- I can’t seem to eat much lately. Is that a bad thing? I think not. My dad thinks it is. Oh well, what does he know. Haha. –Giggle- Well, it’s getting late. I should go to sleep. Yes, I have been going to sleep early lately like a good little girl. –Yawns- Love, peace and chicken grease to you all. -Psycho Bunny Sarah-