feeling a lil achy heh just got off work and i cant sleep not much to say no one reads this shit anyway . last few weeks have been a real learning experince. ive learned how to give a little more acceptanceness twords things like drinking i dont drink heavy but i do drink a little now i did feel bad before but iam over it now . i see the good side of drinking in steed of the bad side wich is getting tottly wasted to the point were u cant walk or stay somewhat alert. it takes my mind of the current things that bother me . like my damn pc keeps fugin up. lol my computer drover me to drinking. iam still aginst my normal things tho like smokeing or any drugs i wont ever be able to ease up on thoes. some things on my mind atm are future things like school and relationship wise. i honestly dont know if me and tara will be togather for as long as i would like but iam willing to give it some time . i do love her alot but iam not sure if i would want to stay in pa my whole life. it really depends on everything so i cant really say now. so ive decided to just not worry about it and just let things happen if its ment to be there shouldnt be a prob. but i do understand that sometimes u gotta compermise and were both learning that. i really missed my family over the holladays iam kinda used to being away from them this is the second year i was away for christmas and new years, so my mom was upseat so was the rest of my family my cusins wanted me to come back heh. its funny tho how u love someone when there so far away but when there just 20 miles away its like u never left and u see them everyday. i guess its the fact that u know u cant see someone that bothers people, even kids. well iam gona either go to sleep or find something eles to do laters