Listening to: Benjamin Gate
Feeling: broken
Me and my best friend have been there for eachother since 6th grade. I'm not about to let that go to waste, but things aren't working out so good for us right now. I love her and couldn't live without her in my life and everything but she is really immature for her age, and it just gets annoying. I can't just push her out of my life, and i can't lose her. The thing that is killing me is that she doesn't know i feel this way, and she doesn't feel the same way about me. She still feels a strong freindship between us. She's going to a different school than me this year, maybe that will fix some things. Or maybe she'll meet some friends that willl make her realize that she's been acting like a little kid for years. She's kind of a small person, i mean she could pass for 11 or 12 and i think that effects the way she thinks. I feel like it makes her think that since she looks like a child, she should act like one. I dont know really. I can't tell her how i feel. Iknow your supposed to be able to tell your best friend anything, but not something like this. I think i'm just gonna give it some time and see what happens. There's not much more i can do besides that anyways. But i can't see her for a while or everything will just get worse and push things more. I hadn't seen her since the beginning of July, and then i went over to her house last night..and it was like i was staying in a hotel with a complete stranger. We didn't make any conversation about anything. We watched a movie, and went to sleep. It was the most uncomfortable thing ever. I lied about not feeling good the next morning so i could go home and figure out what the hell was wrong with me. I've never really been in the situation when i've had second thoughts about my best friend...any suggestions would be super.
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