[ 2 ] solitude

by scrose
Feeling: abnormal
baha. best song ever right? anyways. grounding sucks total ass. i don't know how long i'll be able to take it. yeah. i hi-jack the computer so i can talk to people. but i wont use my normal aim and i'm completely paranoid about it. and then i got my phone taken away this morning. weirdest feeling ever. i'm very antsy about it. i want my phone back. i want to hang out with my friends during the summer. and its weird. i can't call anyone. i'm under lock down. bah. someone save me.
Read 4 comments
Oh boo, I was being lame and looking up something on TNG, and then I got sidetracked, and so I went through and tracked the entire Alexz/Daniel relationship, and of course, I got to the end, and bawled like the pussy that I am.

idk why even, but that was actually like, the most upsetting RP moment of my life. Which is lame. But goddamnit, I remember writing that out, curled up in the corner of the living room of the hotel room I was (continued)
staying in, and it was 12 AM, and if my mom walked in on me, I was dead, but I sat there anyways, and bawled my motherfucking eyes out, while trying not to wake anybody else, and it broke my heart. And apparently, it still does, which is a clear sign that I need to GET A GRIP ON MYSELF.

But damnit. It was heartbreaking. Even reading through all the good stuff, because I knew what was coming, and that made it worse.(continued again)
SO FOR LIKE TWO DAYS, all I could think about was how upset I was that these imaginary people, in their imaginary lives, that EXIST ONLY IN MY HEAD, did not get their happy ending, and it really, really, really hurt.

So basically, it was just me and my overly emotional self getting worked up over things that don't exist. Although telling myself that doesn't seem to help.

'cuse me for taking up all your comments, I lurve you too<3333333333333333
I will do my best dearest <333 I am sure there are people out in interweb land that will make sure you don't feel alone. I also realize that my phone is dead weight now pretty much v.v... i miss being able to talk to you too. but it is not for forever. we will talk again real soon. Nothing will change when you are gone. don't worry. we will all praise your return ^^