At night, I keep the light on. I read and read until I get so tired I can't think about anything else. But then when I close my book and turn the light out, I'm awake again. And I think. And I get scared. My stomache empties. And all my memories of horrible nightmares come back and I try to wash them by trying to dream about school and friends, but then I think about not thinking about it, but then I think about it. Finally I will get to sleep. But it will take a while. I wish I could forget nightmares, especially the ones that have my mom or dad or sister dying. I cried after one I remember having of my mom dying. I don't want another like that. It was just too scary. I wish I would never think about it again. And while I lay awake at night, I think about how I'll wake up soon enough to go to school in the daylight and have fun with my friends. And while I lay awake at night, it seems that it will take forever for me to wake up, because I still haven't gone to sleep. I wish I wasn't afraid of the dark. I wish I could just go out cold like everyone else in my family does.