Warning: If you are easily offended don't read this. If you think it in some way pertains to you, I don't really give a fuck, it probably doesn't any way. In fact it doesn't really pertain to any one person so much as it does to society in general. If you are society in general, you should be overthrown. No school on Friday. Thank god. Finished Keep the Aspidistra Flying. Did a lot of writing. Finally. Party at Jenny's. Some people are freaking awesome. Others are not. Oh well. Things change really quickly. Just days and your entire view on... everything changes. The more I see of life the more I think that its all just a joke, all just a fraud. I guess winter always turns me into a cynic though. But in any case it's times like this that make me just want to leave Amsterdam forever. It's amusing in a horrible sort of way: the way people use each other and create their own politics and victimize themselves so that they don't have to feel bad about anything. The last one's my favorite. Everyone does it. Everyone has it sooooo hard. How do they survive? How do they get by when the whole world is against them. Maybe the victims -the real victims- are the only really good people there are. I've started noticing them lately, all these people who have just gotten beaten up by life somehow or other. They all get spit on by the rest of us who turn and claim that we only did it because someone spit on us first. Well, fuck that excuse, it isn't true. But if it makes you feel better keep telling yourself that your life sucks, it may work. It hasn't worked for me, because I think I've figured out that my life doesn't suck. Neither does yours so get over it. If you're one of those victims then I apologize for myself, though I can't apologize for my fellow man. I guess we really truly just hate each other. I suppose I sound very depressed and despondent, but I'm not really. I've just had enough of this. Eleven years of this, isn't that enough? By the way, George Orwell if the freaking shit.