I hate you when you're not around. Because when you're gone... I remember. I remember the things you say that should not be said. I remember the things you've done that ripped my heart out and shredded my soul to useless tatters. And I know, I KNOW that I could leave you. It would kill me. It would make the destruction of my existence more final... But just the fact that I could... But every time I make a decision for myself it ruins my life. It's better that I leave my life in the hands of others. Others who care. Even you. Who can treat me so badly and have me running back to you... Time, after time... after time. I know there are others, others who would take me in like a wounded dog. Who would love me, and care. And not feed me this bipolar love you've shoved down my throat. When you love me, I am your world and everything revolves around me... But when you're mad at me, that world falls down around my feet and the very planets stop spinning, and those fall down too. I'm left holding the strings of broken things and trying to pick up the pieces. And you say things, and refuse to look at me. Until you apologise, and you feel bad, and everything is good again. The worlds pick back up and begin their revolution anew. And you love me more than you've ever loved me before. You tell me you love me... And my life doesn't make sense without you. I would die if I left you, but part of me just wants to break your heart like being with you is breaking mine.