Listening to: What I'd Say, Pt. 1, Ray Charles
Feeling: popular
I look into the mirror as
soft eye-agitating puffs of talc whirl
and fall dizzily
like a little bicyclist, cowering
because the guiding hand let go
And I say nothing
I have seen myself so many times before now
but never so clearly
no residue could tarnish my mind
because I skinned my knees until they were raw
and sped until it felt my feet would sprout wings...
Way better than the crap you used to write. You've really dropped the pretentious tone and it works out nicely.