o dear ive just cut myself again and its pretty nasty. all this feelings just fuckin really got to me and i feel so much better now its strange but something feels as though its been released when i cut. makes me feel better. a lot better. my housemate linz is pissin me off big time. her fuckin twat of a boyf s here i hate him so much hes just ignorant and rude and he comes to my fuckin house uses my electricity my food and i dont even get a hiya from him. im not askin too much surely? last week we went out got pretty drunk it was linzs birthday. anyway when we were walking well staggering home she was askin me was i all right me in my drunken state said no i havnt been for months and out it all came my feelings or lack of me not eating anymore. she started goin on about how i can talk to her when im feeling down and that she cares for me and wants to help me. i told her i self harm too. id been blamin my cuts on my mates cat and other daft things. she didnt have a clue. so next morning i thought shit she knows but then i thought it might help u know someone to talk to stop me from doin stupid things like cutting. well it hasnt made any fuckin diference she comes in now basically ignores me doesnt barely speak to me. i know it must be hard cos u know she might feel a bit uncomfortable but shes a fuckin student nurse. the basic very basic thing of nursing is communication and she cant even speak to me over it. id have thought the fact shes a nurse might help her talk to me. how fuckin wrong was i i so wish id never said anything and shes told the twat of a boyfriend. he came out wi some remark about people cutting and that there fucked up. hes never liked me excuse me i might have some problems but i aint fucked up. anyway that big rant is over feel better already hmmm well kinda