im as bored as ever so im gonna tell you whats going on with my parents! so yeah actually im not sure whats going on anymore and its sooo confusing i dont know what to think i dont even know if they are still separated they have been going to dinner alot and half the time they come home fighintg, what the heck am i suppose to think?? in some ways i wanted them to get a divorse and ofcourse i also didnt, i didnt want them to get a divorse because it would ruin our family, but i guess with fighting all the time our family is already ruined, theres no fixing it, lindsay is gonna move out and im getting older i dont have a relationship with me dad and nothing will change that, he doesnt try!! and i want them to get a divorse cause then my mom would finally be happy! and there would be peace with us, my mom says my dad is changing but who the eff knows? shes said that many times and it just goes back to the same thing! i just dont get it right now..maybe im too young to understand?? i dont know! and i feel bad for my brothers cuz my dad never tried to have a reltaionship with them but now he is, hes just sucking up and its retarded! ahh anywayz today i woke up ladidadida! i stayed home and babysat! while my family went to the hotel pool i stayed home because i found it pointless to go there and swim for 45 minutes cuz thats all they could do...so i stayed and our friends from out of town said they would come visit me tonight to tell me goodbye and to see the videos we made, but they didnt, so yeah i didnt get to tell them goodbye i guess its my fault for not going to the pool but they said they would come! whatever!!! i dont care anymore ive pretty much given up on life i just dont wanna try anymore! its not like im gonna kill myself but im not gonna try hard to make myself happy! i dont know if you undertsnad, not many people do understand! but oh well...