So... Recently, my emotions have been going crazy. Basically:

• I kinda like this girl... She's local, but we've not met. And she feels 'indifferent' towards me because we haven't met... She's related to one of my ex-girlfriends, which only adds to the complications.
• I kinda like another girl, too. Feelings are stronger, and are mutual... But she's further away. And the distance thing is... problematic, to say the least.
• I've been alone a lot. And feeling very lonely... My family's busy a lot at the moment so i'm alone in the house. I lock myself in my room, because it's familiar... It feels like nobody at college understands me anymore -- the old group have all moved on.
• I don't feel safe. I've been seeing things again recently... Shadowy shapes, shit that isn't really there... Like before, but worse... I used to cucoon myself, wrap up completely in my quilt... I'd feel safe, and it'd help me sleep. Now, i lay awake all night, whether cucooned or not, for fear of sleeping... When you sleep, you're at your most vulnerable. And if anything i'm seeing is real, i don't wanna be vulnerable...

Things aren't going all that well at the moment. My head's full of problems that i can't solve... And everything is just getting a bit too much...