So yeah, sorry i've been so distant from you all ive been having a really hard time. Ive been having a hard time dealing with my aunt dying, especially on christmas. My grandmas been sending me stuff belonging to her. and its ripping me apart inside. I now have no long distance on my phone so call me. My dad is officially the biggest prick in the world he lives for himself always, and i truly have an empty hole in my heart from him. So its final when school gets out, im coming home for good. T-dawg said that she might come get me for spring break rock on, that would be bad ass!!! I'm going to go to pjc for two years, after high school and then probably move out to jacksonville with joanna, unless i get bright futures then ill just go straight to a 4 year school. Last night i had something come over me and i truly realized what my mom means to me. I dont know if you know it or not but she has been asking me to write down what she means to me for the past few years, and i honestly couldnt do it. Well now i can, so this is for my mom. Mom, you have asked me many times to tell you what you really are to me, well i could never answer that before because i wasnt sure mom, i really wasnt. You know me so i know that you will get this letter. Mom you made a never-ending sacrifice for me when you took on the responsibility of raising me and Kenney. You never knew what you were getting into, and even though i bet you were scared you didnt run away like so many others did. You constantly supported me, you were the one that put a cold rag on my head when i was sick, You are the one who picked me up when i fell flat on my face. You are the one that who believed in me, who stayed up late with me when i 'accidentally' forgot to tell you about the project due the next day. You are the one that was there for my first day of kindergarten and of high school. You saw me get my first award and every one since then. You were the one that was there for my basketball games when i scored my first basket, track meets, banquets, dances, and even R.O.T.C. even though i knew that most of the time you were in extreme pain. You are the one that i want there for prom, and graduation, and first dates. I want your shoulder to cry on when i lose my first love, and your acceptance when i find my wife. You have so much respect from me for not giving up, even though i know that that would be so easy for you, for loving me, for your eternal patience, for being the only person that i could turn to sometimes. For sacrificing so much for us, for me. Mom, i never thought about what you gave, i thought that it was your job.{I would be no one without you mom}. But i now know that its not, I was your CHOICE. I disrespected you and caused you a hurt i cant even imagine and for that im eternally sorry, that is something that i have to deal with every day when i look into a mirror. I love everything about you mom, your smart, funny, caring, loving, beautiful, forever forgiving, giving, but most of all you're my HERO mom, if i grew up to become half of the woman that you are today i would be happy. I will never have more respect for any other person. Mom that is what you are to me. I love you with all my instrument, Your Strawberry Girl.