i often find myself turning to this whenever i am confused or feeling sorry for myself. but this is better than an actual journal.. only because i hate my handwriting, hahh. lately i can not understand myself. i act certain ways around certain people, and i know this is a typical tendency among people but it continues to stump me. i guess certain people bring out different aspects of your personality.. and some even diminish certain qualities? anyway that is not what is bothering me. i dont know what is but it's just that feeling that i am living my life with something undetected, that is just growing and growing and someday i'll figure out what it is, but once "someday" comes.. well that could be too late. wow i need to improve my writing skills. wanted to believe in all the words that i was speaking as we moved together in the dark... so one last touch and then you'll go and we'll pretend that it meant something so much more, but it was vile and it was cheap... yea, you are beautiful but you don't mean a thing to me...