Okay, so maybe I over reacted a bit with Mike. We had a talk today, and everything was going good, that it, until Hillary coped an attitude with my mom, and my mom snapped back. Then Hillary went and got Mikes mom, and told mikes mom what was going on. And now, I am so fucking afraid of losing mike. I dont think I have ever felt this way about him. I'm actually afraid to lose him. I couldnt believe I cared so much until now. And I'm crying again because of it, because I'm thinking about it. And stuff. And I think his mom hates me. And I know he was scared last night, that our friendship might have been over. Oh my god, I am so scared. I need my best friend. I've known him forever, and I dont know what Im going to do. Mu chest hurts, my head hurts, and it feels as if, Im digging a knife across my flesh, just torturing myself, until I die. I am so fucking scared you guys. I havent been in this situation for awhile with Mike. But now .... now .... I am. And He's scared, too. I mean, maybe his mom was just mad last night because of Hillary waking her up, I dont know. Or maybe, she was truely mad at me. I cant be sure .... I cant be sure of anything anymore ..... By the way, happy Birthday, Johnny. Your 15, YAY! ...damnit ... Im so fucking Bi polar ....