My pops picked me up when I got off of work yesterday. We then headed over to my grandparents house in the Rillo. I saw my little cousins, and its crazy how fast they are growing up. I feel bad though, because last night they asked "Why dont you ever visit us anymore". Its not that I dont WANT to, it just seems like we have conflicting schedules... they have school during the week, i have work on weekends. Then they were all disappointed because I guess they thought I was going to go to church with them yesterday morning and watch them sing. ...I really do feel terrible. I can be thankful that, when I do see them, we all have fun once we get past the inital guilt on me. Hehe, yesterday they all asked me "Ate Cass [[not pronounced ate, as in "I ate an apple". Its basically the word you use to give respect to elders in my 'culture' lol]], how do you eat so much and stay skinny. I eat a lot but I dont. You arent like us" Lol... I swear, those girls are a crack up. Or, the best one was right when I walked in the house. They see me and go "BOOBIES!" lol... Anyway, I had a good time yesterday. I didnt end up getting my pops something, because I really dont have any money anymore, but he was ok with that when I apologized. He said he was just thankful I got to spend time with him yesterday. Ive been thinking, and my dad has gotten more melow these days. Hes acting like a father, ya know. I dont mean that he wasn't a father before, but we just never really spent time together because he was either living away, or never had the time. But now, its nice... When time comes down to it though, I miss him so much. It was the cutest thing... I was sleeping on the couch this morning, and I was basically awake but I didnt have my eyes open. I knew he was leaving early in the morning [at about 7am] and I heard him rustling about. Well anyway, before he was about to leave the house, he kissed me on the forehead and whispered 'I love you baby'. I just didnt think he would do that I guess... It makes me happy though, knowing that just because Im growing up, he still thinks of me as a little kid in that type of way. Speaking of sleeping, but not really SLEEPING... I havent been sleeping well lately. [[Could I have said SLEEPING anymore times?! haha]] The last time I got a real good sleep was last Thurs night. Ever since then though, I just wake up at least every couple hours. I guess I always end up having "stuff" on my mind... Last night was the worst though. I was laying in bed, but I didnt start to 'fall asleep' til 1am. About every hour and a half I woke up. Even between those times, when i was 'sleeping' it was just more like 'rest'. I finally said Fuck It, and got up at about 8. After I had a quick bite to eat, I babysat. I really need a solid night's sleep. Because this is killing me. Its supposed to be summer, where I can just relax, but I cant seem to. Ive tried to help thinking about so much before going to bed, but I guess I cant seem to get a couple things off my mind ♥ Im going to go take a nap before work.