I wrote this to my boyfriend today and I have no idea what he is going to say or do. Its either going to end really well or make him nervous and run... but either way.... I just need to let him know. And I hope it all turns out for the best. _______________________________________________ I have come to an epiphany while painting... that night we were talking about the cities we loved, and the places that we would love to live in... I said something stupid and rather selfish it was... "I don't know why, but a part of me is starting to love Richmond too...." and you said "Maybe I could with your help, I could learn to love Richmond too...." and it was soooo sweet of you and I can't believe I didn't realize that you said it till now... I'm actually quite mad at myself for not realizing you said that then. But at this moment now, I'm not afraid of letting you in, I'm not afraid of what may or may not happen. I'm just so happy and grateful to have found someone like you. And please don't be mad at me, but I was so worried about what could be, that I was over looking everything, but, not anymore. You have totally quelled all fears inside of me and given me sooo much more to look forward to. In the span of a few months there has been this dramatic change in me. I've never been able to just be out there, and be happy, but you've some how managed that before. Every day you amaze me and just keep me in awe about everything. You over look all the flaws I have seen in myself and I don't know how you do it... but... you're just... I don't even have the words to describe how amazing and beautiful you are. I don't want to scare you away when I say I love you. I'm so afraid that something is going to happen or someone better might come by and take you away, and I know that there are probably better people out there than me... but some how out of all of this... you chose me... and I feel soooo alive because of you. I feel so scared telling you how I feel because, well, A: I have never felt like this before about anyone, B: I don't want to scare you away by telling you how I feel, and C: I don't want to put any pressure on you. I've never been great at expressing emotion towards anyone and I have never been at the forefront of the line to fight for someone, but you make me feel that, and I know its safe to say that not matter what, I will always be by your side, no matter where you are in this world, my heart, body, mind, and soul are yours to keep. Again, if its a bit much, let me know... but I just felt like I had to tell you for some reason. But I just wanted to get this off my chest because I want you to know how amazing YOU are and how important YOU mean to me. Nothing and no one is going to change that, and nothing is going to stand in my way of caring about you, not distance, not time, nothing. Its just you and me Matteo. Love, 李翰昇 PS- I really would give anything in the world to see you right now, and to just hold you in my arms, even if it were for a moment. And I really hope this doesn't make you too uncomfortable, but if it does, talk to me, I've found that you're the easiest person to talk to out of everyone... even some people that I have known for years. And I hope that I can be that person for you, and so much more because you deserve the best person out there in this world. Goodnight my everything, my love, my Ritsuka, my Suai Ge. And pleasant dreams.... PPS-Yeah... I did actually force myself to punctuate this... as best as I could. *Qin Wen, Yong Bao*