i come by everyday, and think about updating.. but i don't know what to say. i don't want to complain. but complaining is was i do best. i wish i knew how to stop this urge. it's an addiction. but i don't know how i can stop it. i haven't actually done it for a long time, but i want to do it every time i get near that box. i wish something happy would happen. something happy, would make this easier. i wouldn't hesietate with every word i write, being afriad that someone will use it against me. someone will though. i wish i knew the words, to make him forgive me. i wish i knew the way to move on. but i'm a fool, and i don't know these things. i wish i knew the answers to all my questions, but no one knows them. i wish i knew why i'm here, and what is wrong with me. what is wrong with me? i really wish someone will answer that.