Yes. I feel kinky. And yes. its been awhile since update. And yes. Im hopelessly in love. so kill me!? do you think that'll stop me from actually thinking properly??? Yes. for the past three days i've been ramling about the same thing over and over and over...and over....be lucky that i'm about to save you from the same thing. Those of you who live in new york(No, tourists don't count)know that regents are coming up. i.e....state wide exams. If you still dont know what the fuck i'm talking about too bad. :) But yeah. i've got a triple whammy this week. One right after the other for global, earth science, and math. baby jesus help us all: jenna might fail all three. hopefully not...im trying to be prepared as possible. Guy Factor: major suckage. Being attatched to someone you've never met before is just plain ol sad. Nuff said. I can't even go flirting anymore. the thought of living my fantasies through another person seems just plain horrible. AND plus, finding someone who won't care, and is a good person, is very rare. SO. i have so much to give. but quite literally, no one to give it to. typing naughty things to my love will have to do ;D although i always refrain from drooping to those nasty drastic measures. I've always said that that kind of stuff is for people who can't get any. That was when i was taken, and happy. Now i'm taken, by a person i haven't even met. and..well. i've slowly been sinking. because i CAN'T get any. i CANT even if i had the opportunity i would back away from it because i feel too emotionally and mentally attached to the person. My love life is a jumbled fucking mess of emotions and loss. WHY must i be so tres pathetic?!?!?!?! TELL ME WHY????! i swear. why do people even listen to me? i'm like...a special gift bearing door mat. The welcome mat people love to see but step right over/on to clean the dog shit, grass, and such off of their feet. Thanx a lot to those people who have put me through that. quite frankly, i still feel that way. Exuse my complaining nonsense rambling. im sure you all have better things to do than listen to me bore myself to tears. But hey. thanks for listening to me anyway. the nonsensical jenna will always be here to ramble at your command. (proof i am a welcome/gift bearing door mat) tata for now. <333 P.S. i lied. i didn't save you from the rambling. too bad. <3