Ok now i have some of my questions awnsered but unfortunatly i have new ones. Its sad when you finally realize that you really can't live everyday in the past. Yeah there are lots of memories both good and bad. But thats just what they are...memories. Living in the past is not a good idea. It makes it harder to move on & just live life the way it is and go on with it. It is really hard to leave the past behind though. Im getting it now. Im not going to foget you and my memories we shared then. we have so much there. I will always remember the things that meant everything to me....mainly you but also...the funny jokes...the parties...birthdays...holidays...all the good times...and even all the bad with all its tears. I noticed even though in every bad experience where im up set, crying, or even heartbroken, something good somewhere happened too. One memory I remember crying my heart out & feeling so alone and I was only thinking about all the horrible things that happend i didnt pay much attention to the fact that I wasnt alone. My friends were by my side through everything. Now im moving on somewhat to where I am trying to look past the bad and through to the good. "Learn from the past...Live in the present...and Hope for the future." The only thing I really wonder is why did you lie for so long to me if you felt nothing? Or if you did at one point love me why did leave & why did u tell me you didnt? Did we mean anything at all? Well no more silent tears.....no more looking accross the wasted years....right?......