hey.... the couple of days i havent wrote in my diary..i have been played and all that shit.... dude i wrote a song for this guy...and he took the shit and didnt evn pay me ..so now we are going through shit with that..i found out my mom doesnt trust me ....se thinks that im sleping around jus because i snuck and got my belly pierced..mom jus to let u kno..im still a virgin..when she foudn out she went bizarre..i had it for months..but she found out...so now she doesnt trust anything i do or say..and that realyl hurts...i tol her jus to make her feel bad too..that its not personall i trust no one..she gotreally pissed...she hadtold me she would kick me out the house..i dont care..i have a car to live in..well its been crazy..my pops didnt have much to say cuz eknew already..i feels like .. no one knows me or under stan me ..so how could they judge me and the things that ido..especially before u sit down and try to get to know a person..i ko i may not open up as wuick..but at least i ould be reasonable with you..dont tlak tome lk imsom typ of piece of shit liek u own me ..thats bull shit..and when ever i try to speak my mind..soemthing holds me bak...so for know on im not goign to try to impressany one or prove any one anything thing..just as long as i know it myself..thats all that matters..while i was gone i wrot liek 9 poems..here is one...give me holla Test the water,water of the ocean flow so deep,flow with motion sometimes its hot, sometimes its cold i liek it warm so u want wipe or u want fold Skin so soft, touch me baby speak the words that drives me crazy Rub me down,caress my body hear my moan feel my jumps' u make me feel, i am somebody your here with me ,we love each other love so quiet, but not undercover u feel my needs ,i feel ur needs put it together ,we have two seeds go out and hang, have some fun get a tan up under the sun just make sure it doesnt get to late my words dont mean shit, u came in a 8(am) its been a wonderful two years, great anxiety last couple months, i've blinded me i failed to see what was really going on until one night u didnt come home Great distress is what i feel your heart so cold, must be steel how could u do this , how could u leave us did ths relationship have any trust said u needed space ,that u needed time how much time u need, im about to unwind it's been one year no word from you got a call heard ur married in malibu tell the kids i loved them to the last breath hoped they believed me when i said i loved them to death im flying over the bridge ,im almost there and when u see my body, be polite dont stare i tested the water, the water of the ocean i flowed so deep, but moved with motion the water was warm ,and i wondered why the same reason i wondered why women make men cry