1:10:54 - that's how long I've been on here for. It only feels like a few minutes. I like it when time passes quickly. My night was wonderful. He liked his pressie, I worked hard on it and he could tell. He's putting it on his wall. I got a 9 pack of cookies. I feel so piggy. We exchanged a lot of words last night. Mostly about our future together and what it meant to us. We agreed on living together. We agreed to use my bed as we found out that his single bed wasn't really big enough for the both of us. It felt weird sitting at the dinner table. I'm clumsy and my small meal seemed even smaller. We woke, got up and lied about where we were going. The first lie I've told in weeks. We bused to the beach. We went to the library and went to a cafe. It was at the cafe that my shyness and vulnerability showed. It didn't help that there were 4 attractive blondes working, one of which he said was attractive when I noted this. We took our shoes off and tried to walk along the beach. He got to see the heels and skirt I wanted and loved both. Now I have to try and make the money before the wedding. My heels are falling apart. I don't think they're designed for constant wear. I loved waking to him. We could picture it everyday. For once I didn't wake to that familiar overwhelming feeling of loneliness. I still have doubts about making him my everything. What If I'm left with nothing? I'm willing to risk it.