"between the ceiling and the floor" what i didnt know then... when life was better than a dream and she cried unvoluntarily (she never cries) i didnt know what to say or how to handle the situation. i laughed at her and she knew. i said i was crying but no tears came and i was clueless as to the situation then. i died. she held my hand and told me things needed to change. oh what i didnt know then. how my life has changed i'd like to say but it doesnt exist, its still the same. the pills are gone but the dream remains and the tears and the hurt and the pain. so distant these days i dont know what to say. what about the chair or the 2000 stone wall or the ocean or the sky or the winter or the fall? ::inside your head, the other side:: all the medicine we're taking... she wrote a page or maybe ten i only found one and it made me wonder. about the happiness she has found and why i cant be with her there now. i hate to be alone. how can you hurt someone you love? 16 pills is all it took. and a vacation wasnt a vacation but a time of goodbyes and "see ya on the other side." i love you more than words or a picture or a song could say and i know you know just remember and please never go away.