Today was like terrible. So like I go to the gym and I go walk my dogs and I swear like everyone is looking at me! Like staring at me. People in their cars, walking, working...its so obvious they are looking at me. So I ignore them or give them a dirty look. Okay yeah so I stare at a FEW people, but it just feels like everyone is watching me. I feel so ugly. It just one of those days that I wish was over. Fuck everyone. Fuck me. Just fuck it. The gym is the worst. I see the same people over and over at the gym. After like two months I feel like I should say hello when I see them. But it doesn't happen. We just ignore each other and carry on with our running. It's so uncomfortable. I was talking to my friend and he wants to move to Japan and like be a Japanese animator. WOW! I wish I had a dream. I wanted to be like a doctor for so long. Then a graphic designer. Then a writer. Then nothing. I don't really care what field I decide to be a SLAVE to. Except exotic dancing. I am not sure if I could handle guys LOOKing at me all the time. I hate myself. All these people around me are going after their goals and dreams. I feel like such a loser.