SoMe18mGoldfiSh: Do u think dat nick eva really loved me or he just said it cuz its like he says he loves every gurl hes with cuz he did it with dusti and im sure with all da otha gurlz hes been with PuRpLeHuLaHoOp: i dont think he knows what love is SoMe18mGoldfiSh: yea i dont either PuRpLeHuLaHoOp: you do so! SoMe18mGoldfiSh: so im guessin u think i really loved him yepperz i think i be right :throwz self big party and invites ya: Aint she just great yep i love her to death and im glad i got 2 otha ppl who agree with me w/ da nick love thingie when i look back at dat im totally disgusted with myself he manipulated me so badly he could make me think anything was my fault i saved some of our conversations and one day i was deleting them all and i read some and everything that happened between us i would alwayz take da blame and im so serious it was ALWAYZ he would yell at me and if he had EVER hit me im sure he knows i got ppl who would have kicked his ass but it was weird we'd be talkin bout somethin like him cheating on me and at the end of the conversation i would apologize to him and be like askin him to forgive me like muh life depended on it now dat i think back on it its just disgusting it all was and im so angry with him i still love him though so it makes me angry with myself *sigh* i hate feeling this way torn between what i know and feel is right and what he taught me to think was right dis is why i dont trust ppl as well as i use to Matt P. dont understand dat bout me i wish i could give him dis site sometimes i really wish i could it might help him understand how i feel bout guyz betta...*Libby*