i have fallen inlove. with you, sitdiary. you help me be honest and get every single thing out. it feels good. even if some people act stupid to it. last night was the best night i've had in ages. first things first, my mom told me we're not moving out of decatur. and that made everything go away. i don't care what happens anymore, because i have what i want. home. so go on, bitch at me, try to make me feel bad; you're wasting your time. then scotty picked me up. we went to ryan's, got ralphie and amanda, then left to the egyptian room. when we got there, 30 seconds to mars was playing. we saw two songs by them, one of my favorite songs by them too. then we left to the lobby for a break. 30 seconds to mars walked by me, the singer ran into me, and said sorry. and i acted like it was nothing, when it was something, because he played in fight club, my favorite movie. i don't care that he sings for 30 seconds to mars. i just care that he played in fight club. i wish bryan would have been there. then we went back inside for taproot. taproot was amazing. really amazing. it was their first show in two years. mhm. then for chevelle, we didn't leave the room for a break, we got up front. i was aware that there was 23432423 fat guys up there waiting to mosh. so i found these two girls that didn't like moshing. and we hungout. chevelle was really really really good. i didn't think they would be that good. but yeah. they were awesome. the moshpits were fucking insane. the two girls and i were the only girls in that area. there was this really really nice boy behind me that protected me as much as possible. there was four moshpits. one infront, back, right, and left of us. i was stupid and ran into one of them. when a fat sweaty dude pushed my face, which hit my lip, i remembered my lipring and immediately got out. then there was a couple having sex infront of us. i don't think i've seen uglier boobs than that. the guy that was behind me ended up hitting a guy for pushing me. i really wish i would have gotten that guys name, or number, or aim, or something. he was really nice. and i forgot to say thanks. maybe i'll see him at warped tour. but yes. afterwards, my legs felt broken and my eardrums were ringing like crazy. once home, keith came over and we left to the park. he tried to get me to smoke marijuana, but for some reason, i was too happy to. so we went to sheena's house and talked for a bit. we left there and saw josh and brandon. josh was trying to talk to me, but didn't get too far with that. keith asked him where they were going, and he said, "to find pussy." then i said, "so you can take it down in the storage room, right?" and he said, "exactly." then we both went home. crashed. and he's been coming over every other thirty minutes today with james. i haven't answered the door yet. but i will next time they knock. sonny moore and i are talking right now on msn. i don't even care much. i threw my razors away. doesn't mean i'm done with cutting. but i don't have a reason to cut now. so yes. if i feel the need to cut, i can always get them. but mhm. i'm really friggin happy. i actually had a good night, saw good bands, have good friends, and i'm staying home. i don't need a boyfriend, or a good relationship, or any stupid shit like that to be happy. fuck that. it's a waste of time. especially when you get a, "fuck you," thrown at your face. hah. asshole. you sound like every guy now. good job. until next time, take care, kids.