It is not often that I am humbled by anything other than criticism, but the way that Baltimore looks during the day, at night, from thirty stories in the air made me want to throw myself over the side of the building. How could I go on living in the face of my own insignificance, my ignorance? I have never felt so alone in my life. It is this that I am thinking of now, in a dining room in Olney. I have a thousand little choking thoughts in my throat, just like my virus, that make it hard to swallow. This is bigger than me.